13 Aug 2014 23:35:20
I had a dream about an Everton fans' forum.

Swan: Roberto, did you order a scouting report on Tom Cleverley?
Bill Kenwright: You don't have to answer that question.
Roberto Martinez: I'll answer the question. You want answers?
Swan: I think I'm entitled to.
RM: You want answers?
Swan: I want the truth!
RM: You can't handle the truth!
(pause)
RM: Lads, we live in a football world that has financial restrictions and those restrictions have be protected by men with financial prudence. Who's going to provide that financial prudence? You, Swan? You, Ed025? You, Cowpat? Bill, the board, and the club staff have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep at the prospect of signing Tom Cleverly and you curse the club. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That his potential recruitment, while tragic in your eyes, would probably save us money. And my recruitment policy, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves money. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't post about, you want me recruiting players like him, you need me recruiting players like him. We use words like ability, character, desire. We use those words as the backbone of a career building a football club. You use them as punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to repeatedly explain myself to fans who live and breathe for an Everton Football Club that I provide and then question the way I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a telephone and buy the club and run it yourself. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to.
Swan: Did you order a scouting report on Tom Cleverley?
RM: I did the job -
Swan: - did you order a scouting report on Tom Cleverley?
RM: You're Goddam right I did!

Then I woke up in a cold sweat - and realised that truth is even stranger than fiction, especially where banter websites are concerned ;-)

1.) 14 Aug 2014
Cowpat Sid, stop eating cheese before you go to bed mate.

2.) 14 Aug 2014
Best post I've read in ages not sure you should be comparing swan to tom cruise though :)

3.) 14 Aug 2014
I knew it!

4.) 14 Aug 2014
14 Aug 2014 19:04:44
Fantastic Sid

{Ed025's Note - it was a great read marty..

5.) 14 Aug 2014
Classic